Madonna, the return of a legend

Ok It had to happen.

It’s taken two weeks, longer than I thought I’d last, but the time has come to speak about the queen of pop - she’s back!! hooorah...fanfare.. etc. etc.

I can, without a shred of dishonesty, say during that time I have made only one mention of Madonna, and as this is not a Madonna blog they will be far a few between.

But things are starting to hot up on planet Madge – after a lengthy absence she is gearing up to burst back doing what she does best - singing.

Her lack of musical output over the past couple of years we now all know has been due to her latest project, a film “WE” about the love affair between King Edward VIII and American divorcée Wallis Simpson.

It is Madonna’s directorial debut and reminds us her love affair with all things British still rages on.

I haven’t seen the film, not through lack of interest though.

I had intended to go but after being in the cinemas for a week it suddenly dropped off the listings for most venues outside central London.

Surely it’s not flopped already?

I am now going to pause to set the tone for the rest of this entry.

At the age of 10 I discovered the greatest entertainer in the world - at least in my opinion.

In the early 80s Madonna started popping out brilliant, catchy, lollipop-sweet tunes, and I immediately fell in love with every single one of them.

There was more though, she seemed to have something to say that the Kim Wildes and Pat Benatars of the time didn’t, and she appeared to be ruthlessly in control of what she intended to achieve – I liked that.

She charged on, hit after hit, rapidly becoming a familiar presence on TV and radio.

At the same time my modest pile of Madonna 7’ singles was growing at a healthy pace in the corner of my bedroom, eventually blossoming into my first album - Like a Virgin.

A few years passed and eventually the whole world was a frenzied Madonna Mania, and I was fully caught up in the buzz.

There were some magnificent hits Like A Prayer, Vogue, Papa Don’t Preach, there just isn’t enough time to go on, but suffice to say she was the best of the lot.


There was also the legend that came with the package - arriving penniless and alone in New York, determined to make it, turned away from audition after audition but still bloodthirsty for success, and finally making it big, very big.

There wasn’t a newspaper that didn’t put her on the front almost daily, TV shows banned her saucy videos in one breath and plugged an exclusive interview in another.

It was around this time I used to queue outside HMV for the first copy of her new albums when they came out, and grovel to the manager for the plinth the CDs were stacked on.

I taped every TV interview and gathered a collection of newspaper cuttings, magazines and tour programmes that could probably (yes I still have them) replenish a sizeable hole in the Amazonian rain forest.

In 1993 I waited outside the Lanesbrough Hotel in London for eight hours, twice, to spot her leaving for rehearsals before dashing to Wembley to be at the front when her Girlie Show tour opened.

I have queued for an an autograph, waited outside hotels, theatres, and football stadiums and parted with an entire month’s salary in one go for a concert ticket - Drowned World 2001.

My relics have pride of place in a sacred room that nobody apart from Madonna herself may use – It could happen....

I am a fan. But I am also a journalist and have taken a vow to tell the truth.....

When I realised I had missed the boat to see WE I wasn’t disappointed.

In fact I was relieved I didn’t have to trek out in the cold and let’s be honest I was only going out of duty, not because I am any more interested in Wallace Simpson than I was in Eva Peron when I went to see Evita.

The feeling was the same as when I didn’t see her Guy Ritchie collaboration Swept Away immediately after it was released straight to video in 2003.

I felt I should, but deep down knew the savage reviews were probably right.

I saw it a few weeks later and they were – it was diabolical.

I desperately wanted to like it, and tried to see in it something that would make me celebrate Madonna’s first acting triumph – but there just wasn’t anything, it stank.

Like any devotee I sat cryogenically frozen to the screen willing for my idol to show the world she could act, just a line or expression that portrayed some depth.

It didn’t come and I was gutted, but I told everyone I loved the film.

It was followed by her album American Life, which, apart from the title track left me cold and I resented all that time she wasted making a film and not putting her all into the music.

I had years before sat through the comedy Who’s That Girl? laughing at all the right moments and desperately "liking” it, but secretly I was embarrassed at how ridiculous it was.

These moments were repeated and magnified in horrific detail through The Next Best Thing, Dick Tracy, and the biggest and ugliest nail in Madonna’s acting coffin – Shanghai Surprise.

I hoped each one would reveal something everyone else wasn’t getting and make me start to love Madonna’s films – but all I got each time was a prize turkey.

Despite all the crushing reviews on WE since it was released almost two weeks ago, I shall buy the DVD and hope it will be amazing – we shall see, maybe it is.

But I have always just wanted her to do what she does best – make great records, and put on mind-blowing stage performances, and I don’t think I’m being a disloyal fan for saying that?

I think that time might be just around the corner - we are about to enter a new Madge era, a return with the new album MDNA.

The name, she says, is a play on “Madonna-DNA”, “MaDoNnA”, and apparently, according to the lady herself “a drug that induces euphoria” - genius in the extreme.

My Madonna neurons are firing in ecstacy as she does the rounds of TV interviews, releases teasers and gives sneaky peaks of the new single - Give Me All Your Luvin’.

The album, the bits we have been allowed to see like the cover, already looks amazing.

And fans know we can expect a new image and ... tries to contains excitement ... a world tour.

She may be desperately hammering away at this movie lark, but Madge, just keep to singing and dancing, we love you for it.

After 30 years at the top she is still capable of causing a stir with her elaborate shows and catchy tunes.

And on April 23rd her loyal following will be there to celebrate as she does it.

Oh - and I am going to post a review!

Follow @ExpressNathan